Mom and Dad going to school at Northern Montana College in Havre, Montana, had a profound impact on me. Dad died up there. I knew he had heart issues because when he came to visit us on Ferry Drive he wanted to walk around the property. The last few times he came out to visit us he could only walk a very short distance before he had to stop. He would stop to catch his breath and pop a nitro pill or two. I think Dad had known for at least ten years that his heart was bad, but at the same time he chose to not address those problems. Back in those days heart bypasses were pretty new and he wasn't willing to try any newfangled procedure. I don't know if he just didn't have any faith in how they worked or if he thought that somehow he would be incapacitated and wind up in a wheelchair or something. I never talked to him about his heart or his health-I don’t recall talking to Dad at all about personal issues.

Yes, he was very quiet and would not discuss his health problems with any of us.

That's true; it never occurred to me that there could be any kind of fatal weakness concerning Dad. He never showed weakness about anything. Dad was very private when it came to his personal issues and never steered the conversation when he came to visit. When he did visit he always came bearing food, donuts, or ice cream or some dang thing, never coming empty-handed. During his visits we talked, but I always talked about my struggles or about my family and me. So the topic was never about Dad or his issues.

I was sure impressed by Dad when he retired from the ASARCO Smelter in East Helena. After just a couple of weeks of retirement, he went back to school. (I think he retired just to catch up on sleep because he had changed shifts every two weeks for thirty years.) I never guessed that Dad wanted to go back to school as he never spoke to me about it. He never said, "When I retire I am going back to school." I just figured he and Mom would do more traveling.

When he went back to school in 1976, in Helena, Montana, he entered an adult education program, where he started with the third grade. In Okmulgee, Oklahoma, Dad did complete school through the eighth grade. He quit school and got a job with his dad in a glass manufacturing company. This was during the Depression and Dad's family were quite poor during that time. There were nine children in the family and he was the oldest son. So he took responsibility to help bring needed money into the family. He decided to begin his studies with early elementary school because he was concerned he missed a great deal of the basics as a child.

When attending the adult education program Dad walked back and forth to school every single day. He never drove and even walked when it was 30 below zero. When I was driving home I sometimes saw him walking. Each time I stopped and asked him if he wanted a ride, Dad hopped in the car and let me give him a ride home. He went to school every day for three years to get his GED before he and Mom went to Havre for college.

Years later I met Dr. Tom Carlin at the Broadwater Athletic Club, the guy who ran the adult education program that Dad attended. Over time we developed a friendship and I started talking to him about Dad and how I was raised. I told him about Dad going back to school and starting back in the third grade after retiring from the smelter. That's when Dr. Carlin asked my father's name. It turned out that he knew Dad because he was the head administrator for Adult Education; he had just completed his doctorate at that time and that was one of his very first jobs. Dr. Carlin would tell me stories about Dad at that school and how the other students, who were much younger, looked up to him. It was nice to hear positive stories about Dad.

-from Chapter Seven: Memories of Dad